Form Failure

Verbs have different forms for a reason.  I know this.  You know this.  But apparently that information is not universally understood:

(thud, thud, thud)

Do you hear that?

 

(thud, thud, thud)

It's me pounding my head on the computer desk in front of me.

 

(thud, thud, thud)

Repeatedly.

I get that certain verb forms actually are tricky.  The past tense of lie being lay, for example.  Or pretty much all irregular past perfect forms for another.

But these aren't tricksters, folks.  They're just regular, standard present-tense-required verbs.  Yes, yes.  I know that thrown is the irregular past perfect form of throw.  But that's not what's called for here.  Why make it harder than it is?

(thud, thud, thud)